What The Hell's Wrong With Me?

 

 

 

Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide. Let's see now. . . .

 

No Jesus

 

No Christmas

 

No television

 

No cheerleaders

 

No baseball

 

No football

 

No hockey

 

No golf

 

No tailgate parties

 

No Wal-Mart

 

No Home Depot

 

No pork BBQ

 

No hot dogs

 

No burgers

 

No chocolate chip cookies

 

No lobster

 

No shellfish, or even frozen fish sticks

 

No gumbo

 

No jambalaya

 

No Beer

 

Rags for clothes and towels for hats.

 

Constant wailing from the guy next-door because he's sick and there are no doctors.

 

Constant wailing from the guy in the tower.

 

More than one wife.

 

You can't shave.

 

Your wives can't shave.

 

You can't shower to wash off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel dung.

 

The women have to wear baggy dresses and veils at all times.

 

Your bride is picked by someone else.

 

She smells just like your donkey.

 

But your donkey has a better disposition.

 

Then they tell you that when you die it all gets better!

 

I mean, really, is there a mystery here?

A friend of mine emailed this to me the other day. I thought it was cute.

 

Your element is Fire. Like fire, you have a hot temper and you can be warm and loving as well and angry and wild. It all really comes down to what you are feeling. You have a lot of close friends who you are very protective over, and with your temper probably some enemies too. You are not Miss/Mr Popular in school since you are your own person and don't want to be forced into behaving this or that way. You are the untamed wild horse, the kind that everyone wants to catch. But you don't want to be tied down for the moment and just keep going with your little crushes. Your will is strong and if you set your mind to do something, you will most likely succeed. But beware, your friends may not always accept your mood-swinging behaviour. Even if you don't mean to be mean, they can still feel hurt. You just need to start thinking some things through before you do them, and not always jump in with so much courage. One day you may be hurt because of that, but then again, your element isn't fire if you start to analyse situations before you act. After all, your nature is to shoot first and ask the questions later.

What is your element? [with pics + detailed answeres] by PainfulBliss

Chris Penn has passed away. He was 43 years old. My condolences to the Penn family.

This is a man I have absolutely adored over the years and I'll probably always be a fan of his and when I found this site I thought it was a joke, a parody. But the more I read the more I came to believe that it's for real. I think this man really IS running for President! He is none other than THE Christopher Walken! How amazing is that? He has some good points and it makes sense: why elect another lazy, corrupt politician who's only out to fatten his own pockets and elect someone who's in it for the people. Think about it, when was the last time we elected someone who cared about the people who, if I may add, should have a bigger voice in this country?
   If you're interested in checking out his site it's http://www.walken2008.com. Here's the letter that I copied directly from his site that you can pass on to everyone in your address book. If you're bored and feeling extremely annoyed about all the chain emails they've been sending you, that is. >:D

The Walken 2008 Campaign

   We're getting started early, and you can help!

   If you're hoping for a new leader with confidence, intelligence, and diverse experience, here he is. Join our 'Spread the Word' campaign and let your friends, family, peers, and coworkers know that they can make a difference. Forget the run-of-the-mill special-interest bureaucrats from capitol hill and cast your vote for a man who answers to no one but the people. With your help, we can kick-start the Walken campaign before his opponents have their boots on.

   For your convenience, you may use the letter below to get the word out and start people talkin' about Walken.

---

To: Friends, Family, and my fellow Americans
Subject: Get America Back On Track!

   It's not too early to be thinking about the future of this country and who's going to lead it. Election after election we're given the "choice" between two unappealing candidates and have no choice but to vote for the one we dislike less. But now, that's about to change.

   Stepping up to the forefront of politics is a new type of leader, motivated by his love for his country, not special interest groups. His distinct image and captivating voice you already know, and now it's your chance to make him the leader of the people, for the people, by the people. That's right... Christopher Walken is running for President.

   Now, at this early stage of the campaign, is when the grass-roots voters like us can really influence the candidates we'll see in the elections. So take a few minutes to visit the Walken 2008 Home Page at http://www.walken2008.com, read about the man and his ideas, and send them a message of your support. This is how the system should work, and now's your chance to have your voice. Don't let it slip away!

   Sincerely,
    -A caring citizen

Did I mention that I absolutely love him?

Post a pic of yourself on www.hotornot.com and see how well your looks rate. Apparently I'm not the stunning creature I always believed myself to be. Only 227 people have voted on my pic and I'm a measly 4.5. How sad is that? Good thing I don't try to pay my bills with my looks. Lol. So anyways, there you go. I'm done now. Night.

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a  sleeping pill and a laxative on the same day.

Know what sucks about living in the South? Aside from the fact that it's the South? Lack of work ethic. Apparantly (sp?) it's perfectly okay to be lazy on the job and not send out customer's bills and then disconnect their service(s) because said bills never reached the paying customers and then they have the gall to tell you that you should've also received a delinquent notice and on top of losing your phone/water/power/garbage service you also have to pay a reconnection fee AND late charges up the arse. I've been in this house for about 5 months now and know how many times this has happened? Nearly every damn month. It's always one or more of these services and it seems that it's pretty normal around here. No one complains about it therefore nothing gets done. Bills get sent out whenever someone feels like sending them out and then some service is lost. Like this month. With the phone bill. And last month with the water AND power (although we called about the power and was able to hold them off until we could get into the office to pay it) but seriously, WTF?!? EVERY freakin' month!! So that's where the hell and FFFF (hehe Yoko) I've been. Offline cause I had no damn phone service. Which was kind of cool since my mother-in-law couldn't call and gripe about this and that. But I sure missed my Buzznetters and my Jay and yadayadayada...Missed you all and hope y'all like the new pics I'll be putting up within the next few days. (No, Mouthy, no fishnets just yet. Relax) Love you all and hope your Holidays were safe and blurry. ;P