What The Hell's Wrong With Me?

"You're not ready to live if you're not ready to die."

   I really like the sentiment behind this. If you really think about it, how can you truly live life to the fullest if you don't stop to ponder and appreciate the fact that Death could very well be sitting in the Huddle House down the street just waiting for you to show up for lunch and choke on a fry? Suffice to say, I don't eat out at the Huddle House very often. It looks like the kind of place Death would hang out in. Now the Waffle House, on the other hand, serves some damn good hash browns (they don't do fries. At all.) and you can have them topped any way you want. I like mine with melted cheese and mushrooms. Nice. Plus, they serve the best damn BLTs EVER!!! They don't skimp on the bacon and it's crisped just right. I haven't had an orgasm on a plate since that Child Care conference I went to when I was 19 and I ordered a plate (platter) of mushroom ravioli smothered in a mushroom cream sauce. Glorious decadence!! Damn, now I'm hungry again. What were we talking about...?

1. Fate Denied Us Victory But Deemed Us Glorious Immortality (and Southerners actually believe that's a good  thing. I mean, really, why would you want to be known for eternity as the fuckers who were willing to go to war to fight for your right of ownership over other people?)

2. Real Men Don't Shoot Blanks (again with the superiority complex. As if any of these fuckers need to be breeding. They oughta do the country a favor and get themselves sterilized. I've seen what passes for prime specimen around here and let's just say I've seen dogs who've survived multiple hit and runs and still ended up less retarded.)
3.  Don't Sell Out To The NAACP. FLY IT!!! (I think this says it all.)
4. Why Apologize For Being Right? (umm, yeeeeaaaahhhh....)
5. I'd Rather Be Dead Than Be A Yankee! (well, get on it. I don't have all day.)
6. The Confederacy Was Non-Union (add your own commentary here.)

This wasn't really meant to be funny, mostly just sad. The only thing you can really do is shake your head and prepare your future generations for the slum this country is going to end up becoming because they are breeding about as fast as the Chinese. The really fucked up part is that most of them honestly don't believe that what they believe, practice and preach is wrong. They believe that their bigotry is justified and righteous and nothing can make them believe otherwise. The Bible says so, so it must be so. And I have to fucking live here. Lucky for the South I can't get my hands on a nuclear warhead. "Lucky lucky you're so lucky!" Maybe tomorrow I'll be a little more tolerant but today, not so much. Not after the way I was treated in a restaurant by a fucking white trash waitress and not after having to drive through Saturday traffic in Tupelo today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe.

A man had a dream,
Danny Thomas was his name.
He touched people's lives
And they'll never be the same.

He built a hospital
With the help of God's will-
To save the lives of children
Who were deathly ill.

Danny loved all the children,
And he did his very best,
But Danny has gone to heaven
Because God wanted him to rest.

Now we must finish the battle
That Danny has begun,
Until the fight against childhood
Cancer and disease has been won.

By Lindsey Wilkerson,
a St. Jude patient

St. Jude Children's Research Hospital
1-800-822-6344
http://www.stjude.org

Introduction to Who Are You? 101 Ways Of Seeing Yourself 
Malcom Godwin