February 11, 2008Patron Saint Of Assholes & Frisbees
She said God sent me to her because He knew she'd need me. I agreed to
clean her house, write out checks, babysit her two children during her
appointments (like this Friday), run errands, check on her best friend
(my 84 year-old neighbor) from time to time (because her own children
don't) and whatever else she may need. I told her it was no problem and
she insisted on paying me. I would've done it for free. I mean, it's
not like she broke her leg or anything. The woman had her chest cracked
a few weeks ago so that doctors could do 5 bypasses (which I've never
heard of) and she's only been home for about a week now with another 6
months of recovery ahead of her. As if that weren't bad enough they had
to open her up again shortly after the surgery because she was bleeding
internally and they couldn't tell where it was coming from. But they
got it all sorted out and she's fine now (or as fine as one can be
after having their breastbone sawed and spread apart. *shudder*) with
minimal discomfort. She can't do a whole lot of anything without
getting winded and I noticed today that she gets short of breath just
talking. So I agreed to help her out when and where I could. She's a
great lady and she's got her hands full with an epileptic daughter, a
mildly autistic son and a husband who's on the road driving truck 5-6
days a week. She teared up when she told me that God had sent me to
her. All I could do was smile and hope she didn't see the bewilderment
in my eyes because I was at a loss as to what to say. How do you
respond to that? Do you just nod and say, "Yep, the old codger finally
go SOMETHING right." Could just be me but that sounds a bit assholey. A
little while after I left I got teased about it. "What are you, like
the Fairview Patron Saint Of The Sick And Elderly? You're going to
spend your days running around rescuing and helping sick and hurt
puppies now? Well, maybe not animals, they don't seem to like your
satanic ass." I had to wonder just how big an asshole I've become that
helping out a neighbor (one who didn't irritate me) would become kind
of a joke to others around me. But then I had to think: well, if I
weren't as big an asshole as I am then who knows how many dirtbags
would be going out of their way to take advantage of my goodwill. My
natural-born and well-cultivated attitude (problem) automatically weeds
out all those lazy bastards and then enables me to help out those who
really need it. So being an asshole really isn't such a bad thing. To
me. It's a bad thing to those who make it on The List, though.
To be continued...
Posted on 02/11/2008 2:01 PM Comments (0)
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